Is the Pen Mightier Than the Sword In the Powder Room

Is the Pen Mightier Than the Sword?

Having a blog isn’t *that* different from having a penis, right?

 

In the interest of full disclosure, let me say that I, myself, am a woman and do not have a penis—so maybe I am not fully qualified from a first person point-of-view. But I have had some contact with them (one in particular), so I think I can surmise a good deal from experience.

There are many ways that having a blog is just like having a peen:

  • Social Media: Blogs can do really well on social media. You just have to be willing to put them out there. Repeatedly. Peens have the potential to do well on social media too, but that may not be the best way to show them off. Ideally they are not something you want to promote on social media—or maybe you do. It all depends on your ultimate goal.
  • Time: The more time you spend on your blog the more it will grow. You can do it every day if you have the time or you can do it once a week (or less . . . ahem), but the less time you spend, the less results you get. Sometimes spending time on your blog can seem like a real chore. All of the above is true of peens.
  • Attention: Both LOVE attention. Without the proper attention, either can sort of wither away and shrivel up.
  • Pride: Who is not proud of their blog or their peen? Even if you think someone else’s is better than yours, you will always be secretly proud of its appearance and accomplishments.
  • Size: Does size matter? There is no need to compare yours to others. Whether your blog (or your peen) is large or small, someone out there will love it. It’s all a matter of finding the right “audience.”

Of course there are ways in which you should not liken your blog to your member.

  • Generosity: Bloggers like people to subscribe to their blogs so that their “posts” are in everybody’s (email) “box.” You might not be that generous with your peen. (And if you are so kind, a word of warning to those of us who don’t like to share would be polite.)
  • Design: Another matter to consider is design. Bloggers live to jazz up their posts with pictures and graphics. I mean the whole site is scrutinized: pretty colors, fancy fonts, gadgets, widgets, column width. Although we know anyone with a peen is concerned about column width (see Size above) do you really want to get involved in blinging out your bologna? It takes a special person to appreciate any amount of peen preen.
  • Honesty: The last thing you may want to consider is how much honesty you are prepared to dish out and take? Stories on blogs and peens alike may be (ahem) embellished for entertainment purposes. Does the truth live up to the tale? Contrarily are you man enough to handle a little bluntness when it comes to honest commentary on your post or your “post?”

Whether you have a blog or a peen, go ahead and put yours out there. And perhaps we can finally answer an age-old question: is the pen, indeed, mightier than the “sword”?

 

Subscribe to our weekly newsletter and never miss a thing!

Melanie Madamba is The NotsoSuperMom: recovering nerd, mother of three, and coffee addict. She would never want to be confused with a SuperMom or anyone else who seems to have their shit together. She’s not trying to do it all–she’s not even trying to do it right. She’s just trying to get something, ANYTHING, done. She writes to escape the laundry and to pretend someone is listening to her. If you are trying to avoid your laundry, you can kill some time checking her out on Facebook.

Keep the conversation going...

comments

Comments

    • says

      Writing can be like sex for me too, in that it sometimes seems like something I don’t have time for, or else I should be sleeping instead. It seems so much more sensual your way!

  1. says

    Bravo!!!! This is great! Of course I can’t speak to it personally because though I have a blog I do not have the other. Though as a mom of two boys I do say the word more than I ever thought humanly possible!!! Excellent piece!!

    • says

      I was SURE that was an actual word. (It’s not.) Apparently you can preen (verb), but you can’t have preen (noun).
      I say: YOU CAN NOW! Let’s hear it for PEEN PREEN! I say let’s hashtag it and get it trending! #peenpreen

  2. Samantha says

    LOVE IT!!! So happy and excited for you. I was waiting since Wednesday to see if your post was published yet!! Way to go girl!!

Trackbacks

  1. […] You have to prepare your daughter for this new phase of her life, for the adventure that womanhood will bestow upon her. You want to say the right things, use the right terms. You don’t want to be squeamish about the facts—the hows and the whys and their inclination towards other conversations regarding birds, and bees. And penises. […]

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *