Jun 19
 |
Are you a dog person or a cat person?
I love animals; I always have.
But not everybody feels the same way.
I know a person who abhors all animals. She is simply missing that gene that makes some folks go "Awwww!" when they see a puppy or a kitten. I'm fairly certain that when her eyes fall upon someone's dog or cat, she can't tell if that creature is a cockroach or a venomous serpent or the world's friendliest dog...her mind just registers: "ANIMAL. Warning! Back away from the non-human."
She's kind of a bitch.
In fact, I think you can tell a lot about a person by how they respond to and treat animals. You can tell even more by what kind of animals they choose for pets.
And believe me, I'm an expert. I mean, I'm a human, and I know stuff about animals. I watch a lot of Animal Planet. Trust me. I'm practically a licensed veterinarian. And one time, someone on Twitter told me I was an honorary social worker after I tweeted something insightful about a celebrity. Probably.
So let's make some sweeping generalizations about people and their pets, shall we?
Dog People as a general rule are friendly. Cat People, on the other hand, are more introverted.
Dog People like to watch football. Cat People like to watch the Academy Awards.
Dog People are industrious and love being hands-on with their pets. They don't mind bathing and brushing their loyal companions. Cat People are lazy and revel in the fact that their cats groom themselves.
Dog People enjoy watching their dogs defecate and aren't fazed by the act of picking up a hot steaming dog turd with a plastic grocery bag. Cat People are the opposite. That's why they buy those cat litter boxes with the opaque lids...both cats and their owners are more "don't ask/don't tell" about their bowels. Cat owners prefer to scoop clumps of cat litter that are no longer steaming.
Dog People don't mind things like dog slobber and tumbleweeds of dog hair...the filth is totally worth the affection and joy they receive from their pets. Cat People do mind. They, like their cats, like to keep things neat and orderly.
Dog People are loyal and warm. Cat People are duplicitous and calculating. Okay fine, I'm just talking about this one bitch I know who also has a cat.
Dog People like to be in control of the situation. It is important for them to be obeyed by their pet. Cat People are less controlling. They don't mind that their pet doesn't submit to or even notice them.
Speaking of which, Dog People like The Gimp scene in Pulp Fiction. Cat People like to read books.
Dog People like cake. Cat People like pie.
I have both a dog and a cat...and a gecko, so I am obviously a voice of authority on this matter.
Did I miss anything?
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Comments (75)
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Report Tue Jun 19, 2012 - 10:13 pmOne dog, two fish, poop-scooping husband. Therefore, the dog surfs. Somehow that makes sense to me.Reply -
2 replies, Last reply by Jenna on Sat Jun 23, 2012 at 9:52 pm
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Sat Jun 23, 2012 - 3:59 pm
Dog people don't mind fur flying around their face all day long. Cat people don't mind crinkly noises & jingling bells all day long. Dog people enjoy being wet with drool and snot. Cat people enjoy the "Shabby Chic" look of shredded furniture. This all makes sense to me.Reply -
Report Wed Jun 20, 2012 - 8:38 amDog people take their vets plates of brownies because they are so grateful they pulled a foxtail out of their dogs eye on an emergency basis, actually not even my real vet, a vet that my vet referred me to in the next town over. I have seen them 3 times in the last 24 hours with poor Landon. I was happy to fork over the $150.00 for the eye exam, shot of morphine (can I have one too) and the eye drops, then back this morning to pull out the foxtail that was coming out of his eye, then back again this evening because I panicked I saw something else......dog people are grateful and very friendly.!Reply
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2 replies, Last reply by Allysgrandma on Thu Jun 21, 2012 at 10:10 pm
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Tue Jun 19, 2012 - 10:42 pm
We have 1 dog and 4 cats. I love all animals (the fury kind, not the slithering and creeping kind). If Hubs would let me, I'd have a whole zoo... I keep begging him to let me adopt anything from a doe to a panther. He keeps saying no. Apparently, the suburbs aren't an "acceptable" environment for does and panthers. Asshole. ;)Reply -
2 replies, Last reply by Pish Posh on Thu Jun 21, 2012 at 9:53 pm
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Report Tue Jun 19, 2012 - 9:53 pmPedantic mode = ON. "Dog People as a general rule are friendly. Cat People, on the other hand, are more introverted". As an introverted cat person, I have to take issue with the notion that introversion is the opposite of "friendly". Instead, introversion is the opposite of being outgoing. On all other counts, however, I can find no fault in your well researched, insightful analysis. :)Reply
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3 replies, Last reply by Pish Posh on Thu Jun 21, 2012 at 9:52 pm
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Report Thu Jun 21, 2012 - 9:50 pmHi Leslie, Well I am a dog person in a cat person's life. Couple of things: I think everyone loves pie ;) If they don't, they kind of don't exist to me. You know? I grew up with dogs, want a dog, but have cats. I am a friendly, introverted, pie-eating, non-tv watching oscar hating football hating nut. Also, dang with the cats I have? I really have to be okay with slobber, picking up poop, pulling things out of their butts, hair EVERYWHERE and so on. The real difference between cat people and dog people? Simple. Mobility. Dog people CAN bring their pet wherever - to the park, on a drive, to a coffee-shop. Nobody brings their cat to a coffee-shop. And that makes me sad. I really want to put my cat in a backpack and bring him places. But he refuses to go like the little jerk that he is. On the other hand, I can be gone all day and as long as there are two of them, the only thing they really miss is food. But if you leave dogs alone all day, even if there are two of them, you come back to "HOW COULD YOU LEAVE ME? WHERE DID YOU GO?!"Reply
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Report Thu Jun 21, 2012 - 5:18 pmI just caved in after a 7 year hiatus and adopted our latest victim..umm...pet. I had a crazy list of demands before agreeing to become a dog mommy again: female, 2-3 yrs old, potty trained, behavior trained, leash trained, doesn't bark, hmmm...What else? Oh yeah, and generally, not a pain in my ass. I thought I was safe and that lasted 7 years. Only you would appreciate that some #$%^ came up with a program that provided just that...And she was trained by prison inmates! How perfect is that!? She can also escape, pick your pocket, and play dead when you yell "Bang bang!". Classic. As for cats, I only want to be one. Never own one. Nothing or no one should be a lazier or nastier bitch than me in my own home.Reply
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Wed Jun 20, 2012 - 11:07 pm
Can we get married already? Because you know everything about me. PS I hate dogs. There. I said it.Reply -
1 reply, Last reply by HouseTalkN on Thu Jun 21, 2012 at 12:27 am
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Report Tue Jun 19, 2012 - 10:15 pmAH-HEM!Reply
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3 replies, Last reply by lhewitt on Thu Jun 21, 2012 at 12:09 am
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Report Tue Jun 19, 2012 - 10:18 pmMy husband and I love to watch our dogs poop. We laugh and laugh and I'm not even kidding. Every single time. It's hilarious the way they hunch over and look away like we can't tell that they're pinching off a loaf. Then they kick at it afterward as if they're covering up the evidence. But we're hysterical in the background so they must know we saw it. Have I mentioned that my husband and I are in fact grown ups? Who just happen to think crap is really funny? I suppose this says a lot more about us than it does about our dogs...Reply
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1 reply, Last reply by The Bearded Iris on Wed Jun 20, 2012 at 10:10 pm
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Report Wed Jun 20, 2012 - 12:12 amI always thought I was a cat person- I never really liked dogs. But we inherited a dog about a year ago and I can't believe how much I love her. I think she has made me more friendly because everyone wants to pet her and you can't be a bitch and say don't touch my dog. That is the one thing about dog people that is annoying- they think everyone should love their dog- and guess what- I don't. (I guess that is the cat person in me coming out)Reply
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1 reply, Last reply by The Bearded Iris on Wed Jun 20, 2012 at 10:08 pm
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Tue Jun 19, 2012 - 5:06 pm
I have 11 chickens, 2 ducks, a rabbit, 3 pigs and a cat. But I like cake and pie. I am mainly indifferent but if I had to choose all I have to say is "miaow'Reply -
3 replies, Last reply by The Bearded Iris on Wed Jun 20, 2012 at 10:07 pm
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Tue Jun 19, 2012 - 11:56 pm
We have 4 do....I mean 4 dachshunds and 2 ca...I mean 2 Siamese. I like ALL animals, but then my father is a retired veterinarian so we grew up with everything from snakes and owls to the more normal dogs and cats. What I despise is when people call them "fur babies". I like seeing my dogs poo because it means they're doing it where they're supposed to, and not under the bed. I think I am more of a dog person because I think dogs are worth more as companions, but I do love cats too. I do NOT like ferrets.Reply -
7 replies, Last reply by The Bearded Iris on Wed Jun 20, 2012 at 10:07 pm
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Report Wed Jun 20, 2012 - 5:05 amI prefer horses. Is there any hope for me? I also want to remove ANY pets from the care of someone who calls them their "fur babies", ugh, feeling queasy at the thought!Reply
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1 reply, Last reply by The Bearded Iris on Wed Jun 20, 2012 at 10:01 pm
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Report Wed Jun 20, 2012 - 5:17 amI found a way to COMMENT on your posts! Thank you In The Powder Room! We are dog and cat crazies...hmmmm...what does this say about us? 2 kinds of crazy?Reply
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1 reply, Last reply by The Bearded Iris on Wed Jun 20, 2012 at 10:00 pm
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Report Wed Jun 20, 2012 - 9:06 amI have both. The only thing I appreciate about my cats is that they are house trained. No litter box for me! But they are terrible bitches.Reply
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2 replies, Last reply by Leigh Ann on Wed Jun 20, 2012 at 9:59 pm
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Report Wed Jun 20, 2012 - 7:45 amGreat post Iris! I tell my husband that his one character flaw is that he likes cats more than dogs. Once kids are bigger i hope to get a Collie dog and call her Melon, she's a Melon Collie! hee heeReply
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1 reply, Last reply by The Bearded Iris on Wed Jun 20, 2012 at 9:58 pm
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Report Wed Jun 20, 2012 - 7:57 pmAHHHHH YES. This? This is why we are soul mates forever. Because you get me. PS I HATE DOGS. THERE I SAID IT.Reply
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1 reply, Last reply by The Bearded Iris on Wed Jun 20, 2012 at 9:55 pm
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Tue Jun 19, 2012 - 2:30 pm
I have two chickens. What does this say about me?Reply -
3 replies, Last reply by Liz Dawes on Wed Jun 20, 2012 at 1:54 am
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Report Tue Jun 19, 2012 - 9:44 pmI have a dog, but I do NOT like watching my dog poop or picking up her steaming pile, ACK! She has been trained her to poop before we take a walk thus she never needs to poop while out! Controlling, yes, I am, (that is why I have a dog), and why I trained her to poop before the walks!! On the other hand, I know where her tongue has been, and it does not bother me a bit when she comes up and gives my big sloppy kisses!!Reply
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2 replies, Last reply by Robin on Tue Jun 19, 2012 at 10:16 pm
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Report Tue Jun 19, 2012 - 9:49 pmI am a cat person. I like dogs just fine as long as they belong to someone else. I have no desire to pick up a warm pile of steaming crap.Reply
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1 reply, Last reply by The Bearded Iris on Tue Jun 19, 2012 at 10:00 pm
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Report Tue Jun 19, 2012 - 9:36 pmI have a cat right now, but grew up around dogs... I'm currently begging the hubs for a puppy. He is absolutely a cat person, so I don't know how it will go=)Reply
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2 replies, Last reply by The Bearded Iris on Tue Jun 19, 2012 at 9:58 pm
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Report Tue Jun 19, 2012 - 9:23 pmI grew up a dog person but now I'm definitely more of a cat person. Which is to say I used to be friendly and outgoing and carefree, but now I'm more aloof and introverted and sort of hate people in general. But I do like cake. And pie.Reply
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1 reply, Last reply by The Bearded Iris on Tue Jun 19, 2012 at 9:56 pm
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Report Tue Jun 19, 2012 - 9:25 pmDog person...minus the poop. That's why I have a husband.Reply
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1 reply, Last reply by The Bearded Iris on Tue Jun 19, 2012 at 9:55 pm
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Report Tue Jun 19, 2012 - 9:13 pmGreat list! I would add: Dog people wave other cars into their lane during rush hour. Cat people cut in line. I'm totally a dog person. Although I did own a cat once who acted more like a dog. He would fetch ponytail holders. Repeatedly. That cat broke the mold.Reply
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1 reply, Last reply by The Bearded Iris on Tue Jun 19, 2012 at 9:55 pm
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Tue Jun 19, 2012 - 8:13 pm
I am devoted to the dog - through and through. I would get a cat but only because the dog really wants one - not sure for what purpose yet.Reply -
3 replies, Last reply by The Bearded Iris on Tue Jun 19, 2012 at 9:53 pm
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Tue Jun 19, 2012 - 7:35 pm
What about snake people? My daughter left in charge of her pet snake, Pink Floyd, when she left for school. I was both afraid and fascinated by that slimy thing. What does that make me?Reply -
1 reply, Last reply by The Bearded Iris on Tue Jun 19, 2012 at 9:00 pm
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Tue Jun 19, 2012 - 8:34 pm
I love them both. I think we have had just about every pet imaginable, even a frog. I PAID MONEY for a frog. We currently have two cats. We give them baths sometimes- you should try it - it really pisses them off.Reply -
1 reply, Last reply by The Bearded Iris on Tue Jun 19, 2012 at 8:57 pm
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