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How to heat things up at home
My Husband is so tight with the heating in our house and I hate it. It's October and it's like an ice-box but my man just suggests I put on another jumper. Why won't he put it on?
Chilly.
Dear Chilly,
Women are the most unbelievably complex life-forms on this planet. They truly do baffle, impress and scare me all in one go.
Woman's ability to devour and process information far outweighs anything a man can manage. Anything you tell them gets remembered. Anything.
Mention any child's name at all and she will be able to tell you which of your five children share a class with someone of that name, their mum's name, and whether or not your child could invite them around for tea one night based on their parents' joint income. They know these details within two weeks of term starting.
A woman can remember your brother's wife's birthday, your mum's birthday, and how to buy, write and post a card in time for it to arrive for them. She will remember any trivia that your mum has been doing and remind you to ask about it when she has also reminded you to call your mum to say hello.
A woman can tell, seemingly without even looking, that the bathroom needs cleaning or that the house needs dusting. How do they do these things? They know instantly that you haven't used the special edge tool thing on the vacuum. How? I don't even know what that is or in what manner you would use it and yet I get in trouble for not using it.
But they aren't bound by house or family related knowledge. Their ability knows no limits. This level of detail they can carry in their heads sits on top of everything else they do. Their normal career and work abilities are a match for any man's (when allowed to be) so they have to learn and hold every bit as much non-family detail in their conscious as a man does AS WELL as all this other stuff! I'm told they even drive cars these days, not nice cars, obviously, but on the same roads as us. This may yet prove to be a "PC" step too far, only time will tell on that one but as long as they don't start voting we should be okay.
What's really scary about women is how they take this information in. They do it while doing other things. They don't have to stop everything and concentrate, they just take it in. Mumble something you are doing that day to a woman, as she walks past you unravelling an inside out school jumper, looking at Facebook on her phone and simultaneously reminding your son where his football boots are and six months later she will ask you how it went. How do they do that?
So why is it, then, that no matter how many times you tell them, no matter how many times you show them or however simple the operation may be...
...that they can never remember how to put the bloody central heating on by themselves.
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Comments (5)
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Report Wed Nov 14, 2012 - 6:37 am" I'm told they even drive cars these days, not nice cars, obviously, but on the same roads as us." HAHAHAHA! The real question is: How is it that fellas stay warm when their gals are so freakin' cold? My dad hates turning up the heat, not because he's stingy, but because he melts when my mom turns it up to a level that's comfortable to her (and the rest of her gender). I don't understand...Reply -
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Wed Oct 10, 2012 - 12:01 am
She did not say she could not do it herself. Hubby seems to have control issues. Divorce is the only option. All your "woman knowledge" - duly processed, stored for future reference.Reply -
1 reply, Last reply by The Regular Guy UK on Wed Oct 10, 2012 at 2:14 am
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Report Tue Oct 9, 2012 - 6:13 pmBecause if we pretend we don't know how to work it, you'll never know that we turn it up every time you leave the house and down again when you get back... ;-)Reply
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1 reply, Last reply by The Regular Guy UK on Tue Oct 9, 2012 at 8:54 pm
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