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11 things we hate about the word 'Mum'
by It goes without saying that we love lots of things about being a mother. Otherwise we would have cleared off by now and rented a condo next door to Jake Gyllenhall.
But back to the 'M' word let's be honest, you spend maternity leave trying to coax your baby to say the word and it's downhill from then. Once they're past age five they make the transition to calling you "mum" in an "I want something" whine, eventually petering out to a grunt in their teenage years.
But it's not the use of the 'M' word by our children that I'm talking about. It's when it's used to group us into one big happy army of Next knitwear, sticky tissues and Tupperware. Here,are some of themost irritating uses of the 'M' word:
1. When couples start to call each other "mum" and "dad", their sex life is now demonstrably a thing of the past.
2. Doctors, nurses, and midwives call you 'mum' when you take your kids for appointments. Obviously it's so they don't have to bother finding out your name.
3. Its part of one of the most annoying ad campaigns that propagates the 'homogenous Mum' school of thought. "Mums go to Iceland" not only implies that we all share the same fashion-sense, shoe-size and postcodes but also assumes that as Mums we actually think it a good idea to feed our children a 3 frozen chocolate gateau. It's as if Jamie Oliver had never existed.
4.Once your kids start bonding with their peers, you will spend at least a decade with your child's name as a prefix to your title e.g. Josh's mum. That's now two steps away from who you were, and only a whisker away from becoming Granny.
5. Pre-kids, you would look at a teacher and think - low pay, low prestige, low aspirations. Now those same teachers have the upper hand - long paid holidays, final salary pension and a big say in your beloved child's future. Come parents evening, even the way they use the 'M' word ensures you'll spend the next six months worrying that the only thing your child will ever amount to is a starring role on the Jeremy Kyle Show.
This is an excerpt from an article that first appeared in our lovely friends Alphamummy blog on January 7th 2009. To read morego to: http://timesonline.typepad.com/alphamummy/
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Comments (1)
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Report Wed Jan 14, 2009 - 4:25 pmIts more at community level where the mum label/we're-all-in-it- together thing gets to me. Freelancing gives me ample time to hang out at the school gates or in the park playground. Here we mothers group together in an almost tribal way. Immersed in whatever group we've chosen to cling to - our shared outlook on child-rearing provides invaluable salvation to get us through the younger kidlet years. I might wear real UGGs but please don't label me a 'yummy mummy'if you look closely they're attached to Bugaboos (our lot are diehard Maclaren pushers)and sport the fixed cupcake smile of smug motherhood. And I've even less in common with Germaphobe Neurotic mum - pure horror rather "than they're all like that" empathy when my kid takes off with her kid's scooter or Ninja's theirs in the sandpit. The Chav sisterhood do look like they're having a laugh, but then they get all narky and lack spacial awareness when they shout - at us and their kids. Our gang's dissing and covern like cackling is our only sense of rebellion in the mundanity of kid-care routine. We want to at least keep that identity for ourselves, not be associated with anyone else.Reply
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