Top of their game
From the vantage point of my couch, I've been watching the Olympics. And these athletes are nothing short of amazing. They are at the top of their game. Even when they perform badly and the tears start to flow, they are performing higher than most of us could ever imagine.
Watching their tight thighs, ten-pack abs, and muscled arms, has made me imagine myself in better shape.
What better way to accomplish this, than to join a Boot Camp?
Now I know this isn't going to be a quick way to get into shape. And it's definitely not going to get me into the Olympics.
This is going encompass a great deal of sweat, perseverance, strength, dedication, Bengay and I might add, a little vodka to relieve the muscles. You know what they say: "No pain, no gain. Feel that burn."
I remember Cathy Smith and then Jane Fonda shouting that mantra at me a million years ago while I did my workout listening to their albums. Yes, I did say listening. I used to play Jane's record on my stereo and listen to her counting out my sit ups, encouraging me to keep going. Work till it burns.
That record got a lot of play and became so scratched that 50 sit ups turned into 150. You know how records would get caught in a groove and repeat...repeat...repeat.
I soon graduated to Jane's VHS tapes, which did make doing the exercise a bit easier, since I could watch what she doing and not have to guess if my legs were at the correct angles while doing leg lifts.
Throughout the years I've tried many different forms of exercise. I even tried the Crutch Method - twice. Each time, I built up my arms and tightened my stomach muscles. But I wouldn't recommend breaking a bone as the preferred method of getting in shape.
I've belonged to various gyms.
And in my past life I even went to see Richard Simmons, but that memory is so embarrassing that when I think of it my minds shifts into a senior moment.
But before I join a Boot Camp, there are a few routines that would need to be added to the regiment.
1. Fan Flickering - to strengthen the wrist for use with that ever-handy "Hot Flash" fan.
2. One Arm Sweater Removal - to help with agility when removing clothes while driving.
3. Mind Maneuvering - to help control tears brought on by hearing a certain song.
4. Cool Down - a leisurely lunch and an extra-cold, extra-dry martini.
And after many of these workouts, week after week, I might then be at the top of my game.
Anyone care to join me?