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Happy Birthday to my IUD
My youngest child, my baby girl, just had her fifth birthday.
It was a reflective time, full of rainbow cupcakes and dancing.
It was a time to celebrate my littlest kid becoming a Big Kid.
It meant there would soon be another five year old in the house: my IUD.
I remember the six week checkup at my OB/GYN's office like it was yesterday. He told me to start having sex again, and I told him, "Not until you put my uterus on lockdown, Mister."
The joy it has given me all these years of not making babies has felt like dancing on rainbows while eating cupcakes.
It is time to change it out for a new one, and appreciate how well it did its job.
Some women use this time to consider having another baby, now that their Lady Parts have only a small window of opportunity left before the cobwebs settle in.
Not me.
When I had my son, I knew he wasn't my only child.
When I had my daughter, I knew that was it. Done. Close the factory: There will be no more deliveries through this loading dock.
People said I'd change my mind.
Nope.
I can hear the ticking time bomb of an about-to-expire IUD much, much louder than my own biological clock.
I'm still positive I have all the kids I want, ThankYouVeryMuch. They are a pure delight (sometimes) that light up my life (when not having tantrums).
I see all I have done for my kids.
I think it's time I do something for myself now.
I'm standing on the precipice of the next stage of my life. The stage when my kids are old enough to be fun to hang out with, but young enough to still be edibly adorable. The stage when they don't need me at every waking moment, so I can finally start to have moments of my own. Conversations with adults that don't include SpongeBob Squarepants or bowel movements. Possibly even a career again.
As my daughter blew out five star-topped pink candles, I wasn't just celebrating her. I was celebrating myself.
I made it. My kids are smart, funny, and rarely ever show up on America's Most Wanted.
So I am sure that I want to celebrate my IUD's birthday by replacing it with a brand-spanking new one.
This means next month will be the first time in 20 years I'll be excited to see a cold speculum come my way in the gynecologist's office, since it'll mean I'm about to get five whole years to finally make myself a priority.
It's about damn time.
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Comments (24)
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Report Fri Sep 7, 2012 - 4:07 pmLove this! The freedom that comes from taking any permanent/semi-permanent step is so damn good. And I absolutely relate to the stage your kids are in, old enough to be cool and young enough to be adorable. I'm there, too and it's heavenly. Now to ramp up that career you mention.....!Reply -
Report Sun Aug 26, 2012 - 1:25 pmIt is funny, I have gone back and forth about having another child mostly because of what people say about an only child but like you with two, I am happy that I only have the one. My clock on ticks when people tell me what an injustice I have done by only having one child.Reply
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Report Fri Aug 17, 2012 - 9:45 pmI'm so jealous. I sooo want to blog about GYN visits and other female related stories, but I love my daddy and don't want to give him a coronary. I doubt he even realizes I HAVE a blog, but if he accidentally sees it and reads words like IUD, tampon, menstrual, vagina or speculum, serious health issues would occur. And I just can't take that risk. :)Reply
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Report Tue Aug 14, 2012 - 9:12 pmUnfortunately, I had a change of heart about having two once they got a bit older, but think I probably couldn't handle it physically. It's easy after so long to forget how hard it was the first few years!Reply
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Report Sun Jul 29, 2012 - 6:59 amGreat, great post! First of all, I love how you show respect for the Lady Parts capitalizing them! Second, It's nice to be in the company of someone who is two-and-through. I often feel like i'm in the minority with "only" two kids. And I have two boys so people keep asking me if/when I'm going to go for the girl. Annoying! And lastly, I say ditch the IUD and send hubs for a simple little snip snip. You paid your dues. It's his turn!Reply
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Report Thu Jul 26, 2012 - 5:05 pmMine celebrated its fifth birthday...crap, six months ago! I need to go to the doctor ASAP!Reply
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Report Wed Jul 18, 2012 - 4:10 amI love love my IUD this October it will be my 2nd anniversary on it . Well mine is called Gynefix (i got it at Marie Stopes international ) , so one day i visited my Dr for a routine check up- She said what kind of IUD are you using, i said Gynefix- She and all the Nurses bursted laughing. It has a funny name ...but works very well :))Reply
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Report Tue Jul 17, 2012 - 8:56 amSold. I'm getting one too b/c there is no need for any more kids. Actually, I just want them to remove the whole damn apparatus. I'm done w/ it & I never much cared for it anyway.Reply
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Tue Jul 17, 2012 - 1:07 am
We were the same - we knew two was enough and have absolutely never regretted 'making that permanent' :-)Reply -
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Mon Jul 16, 2012 - 7:37 pm
Hey Kim, Happy IUD Birthday! Big fan of the IUD. (and you)Reply -
Report Sat Jul 14, 2012 - 6:29 pmCongratulations! It really is liberating as they grow up and become more independent. Enjoy! We have three and our parents live in constant fear we will continue to procreate. Since we like keeping them on their toes we made sure we won't have anymore, but continue to talk about how wonderful little babies are. We think we're hilarious!Reply
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1 reply, Last reply by Kim at Let Me Start By Saying on Sun Jul 15, 2012 at 5:46 am
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Sat Jul 14, 2012 - 8:56 am
I feel you!! After the birth of #5, I told the Hubs NO MORE! We (ahem, I) agreed that it was his turn to step up. I pushed 5 toddlers out of my vagina, he could get snipped. We haven't looked back! Yay for the ability to make that decision for us!!! Happy IUD birthday!Reply -
1 reply, Last reply by Kim at Let Me Start By Saying on Sat Jul 14, 2012 at 4:51 pm
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Report Sat Jul 14, 2012 - 5:36 amI have to tell you that I am soooooo jealous of your IUD birthday. For many reasons, I can't get one. I also can't take any kind of birth control with estrogen. So until Hubs and I are 100% sure we are done with having kids (we are 99.5% sure) and he's ready to do the snip-snip ... well, condoms it is. YUCK. But even through my jealousy, I wish you the happiest of birthdays! ;-)Reply
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1 reply, Last reply by Kim at Let Me Start By Saying on Sat Jul 14, 2012 at 7:54 am
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Report Sat Jul 14, 2012 - 3:46 amYes! It is about time. I'm definitely finished (tubal ligation) and counting the days when the 2yo goes to kindergarten. That gives me three years to figure out what in the world it is I want to be when I grow up.Reply
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1 reply, Last reply by Kim at Let Me Start By Saying on Sat Jul 14, 2012 at 7:53 am
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Report Fri Jul 13, 2012 - 8:26 pmYippee! Happy birthday to (I)U(D)! My current birth control method is having a baby that never leaves me alone, but I'm very, very much looking forward to needing another form. However, part of me celebrating this stage in my life is going to be passing the responsibility for baby prevention to my husband (snip, snip).Reply
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1 reply, Last reply by Kim at Let Me Start By Saying on Sat Jul 14, 2012 at 2:24 am
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Report Fri Jul 13, 2012 - 3:59 pmI totally hear you!! My youngest is turning 3 this month. I have 2 kids (both boys) and I knew I was done the first month bringing him home. I told hubby if he ever wants "some" again, he better get fixed! I haven't regretted it since. I'm looking forward to when he starts school. By then, that would be the first time I could have a couple hours without worrying about the kids in over 9 years!! So I'm right there with ya!Reply
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1 reply, Last reply by Kim at Let Me Start By Saying on Sat Jul 14, 2012 at 2:23 am
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Fri Jul 13, 2012 - 3:44 pm
Happy Birthday to both to your daughter and your IUD! :)Reply -
1 reply, Last reply by Kim at Let Me Start By Saying on Sat Jul 14, 2012 at 2:21 am
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