Four little French letters that separate us from the animals. Take this quiz to see where you fall on the rude bitch-o-meter.
It’s the most wonderful time of the year: SUMMER! Sorry, December, but you ain’t got nothing on the months of June, July and August. It’s time for graduation parties, baby showers, and weddings.
Which means that it’s also time for people to act inappropriately.
No, I don’t mean downing too many libations at a party.
I’m referring to the inappropriate response that hosts receive when requesting the honor of a guest’s presence. That response?
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People: let’s talk about a little acronym called “RSVP.”
Whether you know the exact translation or not, you get the gist: tell the host if you’re going to show up to her event.
Let’s take an RSVP quiz. (Spoiler alert: if the correct response isn’t obvious, scroll to the last line of this post.)
Weddings. You receive a paper invitation six weeks+ in advance. You…
- open it, criticize its color scheme, and let it fall to the bottom of the pile.
- open it, freak out about your wardrobe, log onto Facebook to see what you wore at the last wedding, and let it fall to the bottom of the pile.
- open it, look at the calendar, realize that the wedding is already notated as you previously received a save-the-date, and mail the RSVP.
Evites. You receive an Evite to a friend’s party. You…
- don’t click on the link, and let the Evite fall into the abyss that is your inbox.
- click on the link, look at who’s going to see if it’s worth your time, and let the Evite fall into the abyss that is your inbox.
- click on the link, mark the email as unread so you remember to check with your spouse, and respond within three days.
Informal invitations. Your neighbor texts to ask if you want to BBQ on Saturday night. You…
- don’t text back, because you’re unsure of your plans.
- text back, “We should totally do that some time,” but never intend to.
- text back, “Let me check our calendar.” You discuss with your spouse and text back,“Sorry. We’re unavailable” or “Yes. What can I bring?”
Let me guess: you would respond to things more promptly, but you’re just really busy? Yeah, Honey. You, and everyone else.
Want to know the great thing about weddings, parties, and BBQs? YOU DON’T HAVE TO GO. While your dance moves may be unparalleled, your party tricks hilarious, and your appetizers Pinterest-worthy, this event will go on without you.
If you view the invitation and feel excitement (or obligation), then make up your mind and go. If you view the invitation and feel a sense of dread because you’d rather do something (or nothing) else, then make up your mind and don’t go.
Once you decide and move on, you’ll feel better. Do you ever hear yourself saying, “Oh, I might have something going on that night.” I don’t. I either have something planned, or I chose to pass. Making the decision, however you choose to RSVP, is liberating.
The host, bless her organizing heart, just wants to know if it will go onwith or without you. She’s not going to sing a U2 rock ballad in your honor. She just wants to know how much booze to buy.
So, be a good little invitee: RSVP, damn it.
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